Grow(Community Remixed and Reposted?)

Out of all of the blogs that I have written, I believe this is the hardest one, ever. As I Look back at everything that has happened in the nearly two years since I originally posted this, it is CRAZY. You might say this is an ENCORE to my last Blog and it will be both my last blog in this series and my last blog of the year. By now, most of you know how I have been betrayed and hurt in the last year and a half; I have openly shared my pain and my fears. Maybe like me you've been bitten by some religious vipers spreading religious poison.

Ty Johnston, founder of the Atlanta Pitch Summit that I attended last month wisely tweeted, "eventually, people will show you who they really are." Surely ALL MY FRIENDS who have betrayed me don't think they can lie to God; they GOTTA KNOW they can't lie to or fool the Holy Spirit, which is a serious offense. Luke tells us that Peter boldly rebuked Ananias and Sapphira for this (Acts 5:1-11.) The old cliché' is right, "the truth always comes out( Job 12:22, Ecclesiastes 12:14, Jeremiah 16:7,23:25, Hosea 8:13, Matthew 10:26, Romans 2:16, 1 Corinthians 4:5.)"

Since this is a Christmas blog, it's time for healing. This is a blog about the greatest story ever told; it is CHRISTMAS TIME, which is about so much more than just THE BIRTH OF A KING. It's a story about the ultimate gift, grace; it is what really makes this THE MOST BEAUTIFUL TIME OF THE YEAR. While we sin and break God's heart, He made the greatest sacrifice for us (John 3:16, Romans 4:25, Romans 5:6-8, 32, John 15:13, Hebrews 8:3.) This is what separates Christianity from religions, OUR GOD died for us, because we were MADE FOR MORE.

A year ago I wrote in a Blog that God gives us a new heart and that is part of His way of making us more LIKE CHRIST. Now, LISTEN with me to the words of Jesus in the Gospel of Matthew (Matthew 5:43-48.) Loving those who hurt us is what makes us children of the light(Matthew 5:45.) This is why writing this blog is so hard for me, because CHRIST IS ON ME I must forgive and love all of those friends that have hurt me. Herein is MY STRUGGLE, I even must love the broken girl and her family that have hurt me the most. Right about now, MY FLESH feels like tearing that new heart out and I want to RUN AWAY. I guess this is God putting the "crazy” in crazy love.

Some of you reading this may think that grace and forgiveness are signs of weakness, when actually they are signs of godliness. I challenge you to show grace and forgiveness to a friend or loved one who has hurt you. Trust me, it's not easy. In his book I Forgrace You, Dr. David A. Anderson writes, "Grace doesn't make sense. It's too good to be true. Grace is defined as unmerited and unearned FAVOR. It's extra goodness that is bestowed on us by God for no good reason. We don't deserve it, can't earn or repay it. It's crazy. Yet this is God's gift to us every day..... Likewise, when we extend grace to others beyond forgiveness, we are partaking in redemption and healing that becomes a testimony of God's grace, defying human logic... You must think it's crazy to suggest such outrageous behavior. You're right; I can't believe that I am extolling this otherworldly concept... How is it that people who have been violated and betrayed could actually wish the best for their perpetrator? How can an unforgivable act result in a gracious result? Someone once said that 'we have seen a real miracle we have witnessed a man or a woman who is fully surrendered to God.' Forgraceness takes full surrender and divine enablement.” Imagine what would happen if we apply this to our marriages, to all of our relationships.

So sweetie, I still PRAY TO THE LORD for you and your family, THIS CHRISTMAS. Pastor Allen, you are right, “there have been mistakes made on both sides of the table. “For me, CHRISTMAS THIS YEAR is time to take 2 STEPS FORWARD to the table, to sit down and say “grace.” IF EVER I needed to learn this, it's now, while I’m single.

Later this month many of you reading this will make your biannual visit to your church to do your spiritual act of worship; you have lived how you wanted since Easter and now it's time to ask for grace, so you will go to church. Some of you have left the church because you have been hurt like me. However, what you fail to realize is that the church is full of imperfektion. That is why it has to be a community of grace; it’s a community with NO WALLS and NO LIMITS, it should be a spiritual REHAB for religious people. No matter how bad you or I have been hurt in the church, we can NEVER BACK DOWN or STAND ALONE. Paul wrote about this in a letter to the church at Philippi (Philippians 2:1-5.) Christian author and businessman Brian Tracy said it best, “the value of a relationship is in direct proportion to the time that you invest in the relationship.”

While at the summit I heard producer and media mogul, James Dubose explain to aspiring writers, "don't force it, nothing happens without working the relationships, I know I can't do it by myself. I WISH THAT I could learn how to trust more." APS crew and others in the ATL film circle, we need to WORK together. Christianity is like a team sport, other than Jesus, there can't be a SUPERSTAR. We are not a LONELY HEARTS CLUB, every man is needed. The Bible is clear, we need each other as we follow Christ (Romans 12:4, 1 Corinthians 12:12, Ephesians 4:4,16.) When Jesus sent out His disciples, He told them to baptize people into a community in the name of a community (Matthew 28:19.) And that is what this blog will be about, how God grows us through a community of believers.

Grow (COMMUNITY? REMIXED AND REPOSTED)

Ready or not, let's GET THIS PARTY STARTED. This blog will end this series on how God grows and leads us. To be honest with you, for me this is the most obvious and the most overlooked of all the ways God grows us. I have already discussed in an earlier blog, that God had always intended for us to be part of a COMMUNITY. And that is what this blog will explore, how God grows us through our friends, THA CHURCH and our family. I first learned the importance of community twelve years ago when I started attending the church that I met my mentor at and went to my first Promise Keepers conference with him and my father. It was also where I first went through the Experiencing God small group study by Henry Blackaby, I'll be talking about the study throughout this blog.

Friends

listen with me to words of Jesus in the apostle John's letter to the Gentiles(John 15:13.) Jesus is clear there is no greater love then dying for our friends. I'm sure He was being both literal and figurative. Which means we have to stop being selfish, especially when it comes to money and things. John goes on to say just before Jesus was crucified, He had a meal with His closest friends( John 13:31-38.) This is what most of us call the last supper.

We often call this communion when practiced in the Protestant church, while it is called the Holy Communion within the Catholic Church (I'll explain why later.) It was during this meal that Jesus taught His disciples how they were to serve each other and it was also when He promised to send the comforter, which we have already discussed. Rebecca St. James, once said, "life is about giving away, not taking all the time. We are called to serve others. Until we give ourselves away, we never truly discover who God wants us to be."

Bob Briner and Ray Pritchard discuss this IN their book, "Leadership Lessons of Jesus." In the chapter titled "Eating with the Troops" they say, "nothing brings down the barriers among friends like having a meal together. This is why Jesus often used food or a meal to teach his greatest lessons to his disciples. He uses meals as a backdrop for teaching, learning and growing together." Interestingly enough, most men's ministries revolve around some type of meal ( i.e . wild game dinners and breakfasts.) Take it from me, most leaders fail to use this time for teaching and it ends up being a time to socialize about football, baseball, hunting or Nascar(all of which I hate.)

This is why speaker and author Steve Sonderman shared with us at a Promise Keepers pastors conference that he told the men of his church,” the days of the good ol' boy eat, burp, belch and pray breakfast" were over. The point being, we learn from our friends, if we listen. Maybe if I would have listened to my friends Jubba and Sanjay, God would not had to CHISEL ME with God's chisel.

Maybe if I had not been so hardheaded and listened when my friends told me how much respect they lost for me when I first tried drugs, I wouldn't had to go through all the pain I did with my accident. The Bible has a lot to say about friends. Listen to the wisest man who ever lived wrote in the book of Proverbs (Proverbs 17:17, 18:24, Proverbs 27:6, Proverbs 27:17.) Listen to Jesus as John continues during Jesus’ last meal with his friends( John 15: 14-17.) Even though some doubted Him, Jesus still loved them and called them His friends.

Go back with me to the Old Testament and let's continue listening to the wisest man (Ecclesiastes 4: 9-12.) It all goes back to the first community, the trinity.

Listen as the apostle Paul warns us in his first letter to the church in Corinth (1 Corinthians 5:33-34.) Mike Foster and Judd Wilhite wrote in their book, "it's also important to understand this book isn't just about you and your deal. Character is both a personal and a community concept. If you are a person of great character, all those around you benefit. The organization, the relationships, the families; they all win. The building of character is a community thing. There are no lone rangers. We need to train together, fight together, and watch each other's backs. True leaders make tough decisions to battle for integrity together no matter how inconvenient or how it may stretch us. They go on to say, "character is a daily, moment-by-moment process. There is no finish line. There is no box to check off when we have mastered it. We are in this for life."

Mike and Jud use the TV series Kung Fu to illustrate this point; when "Master Po gives Caine the nickname, grasshoper, for two reasons. At one level this a term of affection given by an older person to younger person. It also refers to a moment when the old and blind master Po sensed a small grasshopper at young Caine's feet, but Cain did not see it. The name always reminds Caine of how he did not sense was right before him. It reminds him how much he still needs to learn and how far he needs to go." This picture illustrates how we need each other, especially men.

This is why I love getting together with my BLOOD BRUTHAS. You often hear me mention my mentor and pastor, I NEED YOU guys and you can LEAN ON ME. Because, whether it is at a Promise Keepers conference, Men at the Cross rally or at my church's Tuesday morning breakfast, that is WHEN THE BOYS LIGHT UP. It is a time for sharing with each other our struggles and hurts, learning from each other and a time to pray for each other.

This is why I also attend a recovery class every Tuesday at my old church. Which Robb bell talks about in his book, "Jesus wants to save the Church in Exile (a manifesto for the church in exile) in which Bell says, "an AA meeting is a roomful of people who are done pretending. There are no facades. There is no acting. Everybody in that room is in recovery from addiction, and they all know each other's games, masks and manipulations. A whole world of posturing and pretending is simply absent. You're there because you hit rock bottom, at least most of the time and you meet others who know how it feels.

Writer Anne Lamott says that the most powerful sermon in the world is two words: 'me too.' I agree. When you're struggling, when you are hurting, wounded, limping, doubting, questioning, barely hanging on, moments away from another relapse, and someone can identify with you- someone knows the temptations there are at your door, somebody has felt the pain that you are feeling, when someone can look you in the eyes and say, 'me too.' And actually mean it--it can save you." Bell goes on to say in his latest book, "Drops like Stars", “it doesn't matter if you are rich or poor or black or white or right or left or young or old--have had the same disease as someone else or if you both have a daughter with an eating disorder or have a brother in jail or had a spouse die. Or you were recently fired. You have a bond that transcends whatever differences you have. That's what suffering does."

Bell calls this, "THE ART of solidarity." He asks, "is this why people wear crosses around their necks? The first Christians insisted that when Jesus died on the cross, this wasn't just another execution by the Roman Empire. They believe this was the divine, in flesh and blood, hanging there on the cross, bloody, thirsty, and suffering. A God who is not somewhere else- remote, detached distant- but among us, feeling what we feel, aching how we ache. Suffering like us. We have a saying at my Tuesday recovery class. It is, "meeting makers make it,"the point being if you are truly serious about your recovery, you will commit to the meeting.

In his book The Remnant, Larry Stockstill writes, “it is impossible to have true fellowship without discipleship." Thus, without discipleship, all you have is a bunch of fellows sitting around talking. He quotes the writer of the book of Hebrews. Who encourages us, "not to forsake the meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another- and all the more as you see the Day approaching(Hebrews 10:25.)

Stockstill points out that every time the early church met, the Scriptures were always read aloud. Discipleship is not optional in regard to fellowship. I first learned about this when I went through the Experiencing God Bible study. In which Henry Blackaby quotes the apostle John, by saying, "that which we have seen and heard. We declare to you, that you also may have fellowship with us; and truly our fellowship is with the Father and with His Son 'Jesus Christ.' Then John adds, "significantly, and these things we write you that your {and our joy.} May be full."

More importantly, this is where I first heard and learned about Koinonia. Blackaby writes, "Koinonia is not an option for a believer. Koinonia is not optional for a church. To be 'in Christ' and to be a member of his body requires fellowship with the living Christ. The love relationship, the Koinonia, the fellowship you have with God is the most important aspect of your knowing Him, knowing His will and being unable to do His will. Only God can produce genuine Koinonia." It is a DIVINE INSPIRATION; again as with the Holy Spirit, we cannot control this. Blackaby goes on to say, "intimate fellowship with God and His Son, Jesus Christ, produces fellowship with Christian brothers and sisters. The supreme expression of this divine fellowship is manifested when people with major differences are brought into the living spiritual fellowship." Which is the church.

The Church

In his book Dug Down Deep, Joshua Harris shares a story he heard once on the radio about a summer (which is appropriate, seeing how Spring has sprung, depending on where you live) camp for atheist children. In the story Harris explains, “some guy thinking it wasn't fair for the religious kids to have all the fun camps and programs while the atheist kids got nothing. So he started a camp for atheist kids, a place where students can play and swim, do crafts and sit around campfires talking about evolution and how ludicrous religion is. One part of the story featured a few of the atheist kids railing against religion. One girl was pretty fired up. And she said something like, "and if there is a God, why doesn't He come out and show himself? Why doesn't He just appear and say, 'hello, I'm God. Believe in me. Why doesn't he do that?'

Harris explains," What God does is MIND BLOWIN'!" God is writing His story through His children, through His church, through us. He makes us the show. He proves himself and displays Himself through the church." God chooses us to represent Him. Author John MacArthur goes into a little more detail in his book "Twelve Ordinary Men", when he describes Jesus's calling of the twelve disciples, saying, "there was no second string, no backup players, no plan B if the twelve if should fail. The strategy sounds risky in the extreme. In earthly terms, the founding of the church and the spread of the gospel message depended entirely on those twelve ordinary men with their obvious weaknesses." MacArthur goes on to say, "Christ knew exactly what He was doing. From His divine perspective, the ultimate success of the strategy actually depended on the Holy Spirit working in those men to accomplish His sovereign will.

It was a mission that could not be thwarted. That's why it was the work for which God alone deserves praise and glory. Those men were merely Instruments in His hands--just as you and I can be God's instruments today. God delights to use such ordinary means." Listen to the apostle Paul put it in his first letter to the church in Corinth (1 Corinthians 1:20-28.) So God set up the church to prove GOD'S REAL.

Harris continues to say," most Christians neglect the doctrine of church. That's not really surprising. This setting by necessity involves people, real annoying, infuriating, obnoxious, stubborn people." J. I. Packer says God's mission for the church in his book "Concise Theology: a guide to Historic Christian Beliefs" is to make the invisible Kingdom visible through faithful Christian living and witness bearing."

When we are covered in THE BLOOD of Jesus, we become the RED LETTERS for the world to read. Joshua Harris says that, "every metaphor Scripture uses to describe the church shows how deeply God cares about the church." Scripture reveals HEAVEN'S HEART for the church. Since we've already discussed the Holy Spirit, we will start there (Ephesians 2:22, 1 Corinthians 3:16.) BECAUSE OF YOUR LOVE for God, you shouldn't dishonor Him by using your body to sin.

Listen as Paul continues in a second letter to the church in Corinth ( 2 Corinthians 6:16.) So, I BE the church and you are the church. If we are the blody as Paul tells us. Then we are God's hands and feet that God uses to spread the gospel. Which leads me to wonder why so many churches are more concerned about programs and buildings when the people are the church? So LET THE CHURCH RISE.

In the Experiencing God small group study, Blackaby quotes the Apostle Paul's letter to the Corinthian church, "a local body of believers, and said; 'you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is part of it.' Just as your physical body needs every part in order to live a normal and healthy life, so the church needs every member in order to live a normal and healthy church life. No member can say of any other member, I don't need you. Apart from the other members of the church (the body) you will not be able to experience the fullness of life God has intended for you.

When one member is missing or not functioning as God intended, the rest the body will miss out on the fullness of life God has intended for the church. God places members in the body as it pleases Him." Ironically, we often think we leave a particular church to attend elsewhere on our own. This is actually another instance of the leading of the Spirit. That is why I am free to be me and UBU.

For those of you know me, you know that I skate with a group of skaters called the Augusta Jamskaters which is made up of skaters with different styles and tastes. Like founder Toure "uncle Jamm" Clark and Joey Fulghum with his MJ-like skate moves and me the new guy that wants to be a Br8kS8.

Although we are each different, WE'RE ALL ONE team. Jim Daley (president and CEO of Focus on the Family) recently said," yes, I'm a different person from our founder (Dr. James Dobson.) God has gifted each one of us uniquely. But, again, what's important is that I, too, am committed to offering families, tangible guidance, Biblical truth and an compassionate listening ear…..We want to come alongside families, no matter where they are on life's pathway, and engage them in a meaningful, two-way conversation. Every day, we're looking for new opportunities to encourage husbands, wives, parents and kids in authentic ways- whether they simply have a question or face an all-out crisis."

A few years ago I felt led to leave the church I had been attending for nine years. Honestly, I didn't want to leave. I had so many friends there, these people had become like family to me. When my father died, my choir family (Laverne, I miss you) came to his funeral as well as my mother's funeral. I even had a friend that I sang in the choir with who was a doctor. And anytime I had concerns about my health due to my near-death experience, I could just ask him about it or let him know. I felt so safe there, THIS CAN'T BE. I still felt led to leave that church.

It wasn't until I realized that the purpose of going to church was for me to grow and serve. Not for the church to serve me that I realized I wasn't growing spiritually and couldn't serve anymore where I was, I knew then why I had to leave and I've had peace ever since.

Listen to what the apostle Paul wrote in his letter to the church in Ephesus (Ephesians 2:19.) So here Paul says, "we are part of God's household. WE ARE FAMILY. This reminds me of something Promise Keeper’s emcee Reggie Dabbs likes to say. He usually starts each conference by saying, "I am your brother from another mother." Which, THE TRUTH be known, we don't always get that right, do we? I'll talk about this a little later. It is so important to understand that we are part of God's family, listen to how the apostle Paul starts his letter to the church in Ephesus (Ephesians 1:1-4.). This reminds me of ’s testimony of Justin Lookadoo how he was adopted. Lookadoo says, "when we are adopted, we are CHOZEN."

The Bride

The last metaphor the Bible uses to describe the church really hits home for me. Actually, God teaches us men so much and shows us how much we need to MAN UP and grow up. Listen closely to the words of the apostle Paul in his letter to the church in Ephesus(Ephesians 5:25-32.) Every man knows this is a SUPERNATURAL mystery. Paul is clear that church is THE BRIDE of Jesus.

I recently heard Jonathon Farwell explain in a sermon about marriage, "the word cleave means that people walk so close together that you couldn't tell their footprints apart in the sand." Here Paul is saying the church is one with Jesus like a husband is with his wife. the apostle Paul describes the church as a bride. Guys, this is marriage 101, first we http://www.fileden.com/files/2006/9/20/230122/protects.jpg our bride and then we SERVE and provide for our families.

Maybe I am just a helpless romantic, what better way for God to describe the church to men, than to use the analogy of marriage to the relationship of Jesus's DEEP Love for the church. Then again the church hasn't exactly gotten the concepts of marriage and love right, has it? Do we really understand love,what is love? The apostle John tells us, "GOD IS LOVE ( 1 John 4:8-20.) And like I explained in my last blog God does not change.

We need to understand that just as God doesn't change, neither does love. There is no letter "d" in the word love. Although circumstances may change, our commitment by definition must remain. Look closely at the words of the apostle Paul in "the love chapter “of his first letter to the church in Corinth(1 Corinthians13:4-8.)

It is here that Paul's next words are the most helpful and underappreciated (1 Corinthians 13:11-12.) Paul tells us that we can't understand love until we grow up." The latest statistics show that a little more than half of Christian marriages end in divorce, worse than marriages outside of the church.

It seems every time we turn on the news there's another big sex scandel or find out about another LOVECHILD. Does ANYBODY value their vows anymore? For you brothers that can't seem to get a grip on what it means to be married, I am more than willing to offer the Christian hand of fellowship(preferably my right hand) to help you understand.

It is through the bridegroom (Jesus) that God says, LET ME SHOW YOU THE WAY to love. For me, this puts everything in perspective; How to love your families, friends, and how to love your wives. I have already discussed in an earlier blog that marriage isn't just about being happy. What Jesus teaches us is that marriage is more about serving. I once heard a message by Pastor Jentzen Franklin on Godly commitment in which he says, "too many Christians go to church for what they can get from it(i.e. programs, safety) thinking the church has to serve them. When really they should ask,' how can I serve the church?'

Unfortunately, guys and gals, this is how too many people go into marriage. We all have friends that go from one relationship to another and at the first sign of trouble or moment they don't feel happy, they want out. We all know people that BOUNCE from one church to another. You know, church hoppers.

Harris calls this the "church hopping syndrome. When people stop in (usually when they're in a hurry) to get filled up. Then they go to the one that's most convenient for them. They get what they need and then move on. Harris explains that this happens, "because there is no real commitment or engagement."

Last year I attended my father's best friend's 25th wedding anniversary in Colorado. I heard something there that has stuck with me ever since. A divorce attorney (of all people) that performed the ceremony stated, "you can plan a wedding. But a marriage takes WORK." And that's what commitment to anything is,work. Recently actor Ashton Kutcher tweeted about his divorce from Demi More, "marriage is one of the most difficult things in the world."

Timing

Most men know timing is everything, it is an innate trait that men have. Scripture confirms the importance of timing. How many times did Jesus say, "the time has not come?" As MY FRIEND and brother Hal Taylor shared with me a couple of years ago, his favorite passage is Galatians 4:4-7. God knew when to REDEEM ME at just the right time, Not a moment before the prophecies of old had predicted or a moment late."

This is what most of prophecies were about, the coming of Jesus (the bridegroom) or preparing the people of God (the bride) for His coming. For those of you who know me, all it takes is a brunette with big brown eyes(yep, yep) and I become like a RUNAWAY TRAIN that has derailed, full speed ahead and out of control; fortunately for me, I have grown up and learned that looks are not as important as character. I've already discussed in a previous blog how I am waiting (hgh) for a LADY that walks the walk. And this is how God works also.

Do you remember the story we all learned about King David in the book Samuel (1 Samuel 16:7?) Later David’s son who is the wisest man ever wrote something similar (Proverbs 30:31-32.) Yet, as I mentioned earlier, the church is more concerned about how it looks in the community, whether it is buildings with the latest equipment, trends, programs or the music. How often do you hear about what this church or that denomination has done or is going to do? How often do you hear the church boast about what they've done and start namedroppin'? Then say they did it in love. Ah, love is not proud, and does not boast, remember?

Jesus gives us instructions on giving in Matthew's letter to the church (Matthew 6:2-4.) Joshua Harris asks, "what is your definition of success for the church? Numbers? Political power? The expectations of Christianity in popular culture?” We often throw the word church around as carelessly as we do the term love. Maybe you've heard a singer or speaker casually say, “we are about have church up in here."

However, Joshua Harris points out, "since the Reformation, Protestant Christians have agreed that the church requires two essential elements: the right preaching of God's word and the right practice of baptism (which we don't always get right) and communion." Listen closely to the apostle Paul's warning produced protégé in his second letter to Young Timothy ( 2 Timothy 3:16-17.) Paul had already explained this in his first letter to the church in Corinth (1 Corinthians 12:1-3.) Harris explains, "that the church is built on a specific message, not just any random idea or philosophy."

Harris explains, "the priority of baptism and communion emphasizes the necessity of the church being a defined community fixated on the gospel of Jesus Christ. Baptism symbolizes a Christians entrance into the church (not their salvation.) Matthew tells us, ‘therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you and surely I am with you to the end of the age.’ While Communion is repeated many times in a Christian's life as Jesus instructed His disciples to do in remembrance of Him.”

In his book, "Sex God" Rob Bell explains the genius and symbolism of what Jesus was saying during the last supper. Bell explains, "in Jesus' time, the Jewish tradition of engagement involved a man offering a woman a cup of wine. If she accepts it, they were engaged and one day would become one." That is why after the disciples accepted the cup this during the Last Supper, Jesus no longer called them servants, but friends.

Each time we observe communion. We are to remember our commitment as the bride. Recently, I looked up the origin of the word communion. I learned it comes from the Latin word communis in which comm-means oneness and unus-means union. Together it literally means a union of oneness. Which is why the Catholic church is so strict about who can observe Holy Communion. Men(and women,) if you can't be a faithful to the one you go home to every night and see. How can you be faithful to one you can't see? Sound familiar?

I often shy away from talking about the subject of marriage, because I'm single. However, more and more I have come to realize (especially through the writing of this blog) that I have more time to focus on following God. As you know, my blog on Facebook is called "Spiritual Perspectives Of Da Single Guy”, as the apostle Paul wrote in his first letter to the church in Corinth(1 Corinthians 7:33 – 34.)

Not that I think I am better than anybody. Nor that I don't want to get married, we all WANNA BE LOVED. The guys (Randy and Robert) hammer me about this during the Tuesday morning breakfasts. As I explained to them, I am not looking for a perfect wife. But a wife that is perfect for me. We all know Eve wasn't perfect, but she was suitable(perfect) for Adam(Genesis 2:18 – 25.)

And there is a perfect bride for the second Adam(Jesus.) The church, for her there is not ANOTHER MAN and He is not chasing another bride. Until she is ready, there can't be a wedding. However, there will be a wedding. He hasn't gotten the wedding. It is just a MATTER OF TIME.

Listen to what the apostle John tells us that Jesus told the disciples that during the last supper with his friends (John 14:1-4.) This would fulfill the Jewish tradition of the day. This is, if a woman accepts the cup of wine. The man would often begin building an addition to his family's house where he and bride would live. When he finished building the addition he would return for his bride.

Later The apostle John tells us in a letter he wrote a while in exile on the island of Patmos that he had a vision of this promise being fulfilled and the heavens singing THE WEDDING Song(Revelation 19:1-7.) And that is when the J TRAIN that can't be stopped will come for his bride. even if she walked away or died, He will still come back for her. That's basically what the apostle Paul wrote in his first letter to the church in Thessalonica (1 Thessalonians 4:14-16.)

After that, we who are still alive, and will are left will be CAUGHT UP together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever." The bridegroom will never leave the bride; she does not get left behind. This is why I don't understand how everybody including the church can be so afraid that the end of the world is near. As long as the church (bride) is still here the end is not near. The apostle Paul has told us that THE SKY MAY FALL, but the bridegroom (Jesus) will protect his bride by what some call the rapture. Thus, the church will FLY AWAY, fulfilling the prophecies of old. If you go back and study the prophets of the Old Testament, you will see that every time God's people turn from him, God spoke to them through the prophets trying to get them to return to Him. I often hear us older Christians ask, "why is Jesus waiting so long to return?" Jesus knows His bride is not ready, so PEOPLE GET READY. Maybe it is time for the bride to get ON YOUR KNEES.

I have enough faith that IN TIME I will meet the perfect woman for me. Even if she were in my life now, I would not approach her about marriage until I know she was ready. But when I know she is ready and IT IS TIME, I won't need any signs or need to ask my mentor or anybody for advice. Nope, in blink of an eye I am coming for my bride; as long as I have waited for my bride, when she accepts my cup of wine. Trust me, there will be a wedding jitters. I continue to wait because I firmly believe we only get ONE SHOT at marriage. This is why I have started most of these blogs on growth by making some comment about being ready.

Psychology teaches us that men are the only creatures that study their mates. It is another natural, sub-conscience habit of men. It is so natural that we don't even realize that we are doing it. Last year while I was visiting some friends in Colorado I went to a popular tourist attraction called Seven Falls, while there I saw a necklace with a leaf on it in the gift shop there and immediately thought about an acquaintance back home I had a conversation with about how she loves The season of Fall, because of the leaves. Actually she is why I designed my blog layout to have the falling leaves in the background.

I had been studying her and I didn't even realize it. In HINDSIGHT, I don't think a DAY GO BY since then that I don't think about you, sweetie. Now if Jesus was fully God and fully man, wouldn't it make sense that He studies His bride which He will spend eternity with? Most of the parables that Jesus taught with dealt with faith and service. Jesus often asked His disciples if He would find them faithful. Given the track record of God's people in the Old Testament, I would be studying my bride very closely.

Question is when Jesus returns, will He find His lady or an imposter? Joshua Harris asks, "if the church was so important to Jesus for Him to die for her, then why is she avoiding Him( I can relate?)" Why are so many professing Christians making excuses not to be with other Christians? Where is the church?

There is no doubt that the church has not been as faithful to Jesus as He has been to His bride. Here again God teaches us men how to love. Jesus knew His bride would not be faithful, yet we know we have NEVER BEEN UNLOVED. No wonder Jesus is tarrying. We can be more, we have to. Listen to the apostle Peter (2 Peter 3:14.) You can bet Jesus is missing His bride. A few weeks ago my younger brother who is in the Army had to leave his new bride(love ya sis) he married in October to return to the frontline in Afghanistan. Every day I see one writing to the other on my Facebook page, "I am MISSING YOU or something like I can't wait to have you IN MY ARMS AGAIN." I know my brother doesn't want to be away from his wife and can't wait to get back to her. This leads me to the next way God grows us through community.

Family

Rob Bell starts his book, JESUS WANTS TO SAVE CHRISTIANS (a manifesto for the church in exile) explaining that the human race starts in the book of Genesis with a family, "the first family was dysfunctional. “The first husband (Adam) had failed to be the head of his family; one of his children killed and buried the other; then on top of that, lied about it (no comment,) from then on the family apart. Here we see that our families, whether healthy or dysfunctional is the first community we encounter in our lives. So the importance of the family is obvious, and the devil knows this. That is why he attacked the first family (not the Obamas!) And he continues to attack families today by his attacks on the very definition of marriage, which is as pastor and speaker Dr. James Merritt says, “marriage is not just between any man and any woman, but between a husband and his wife."

As I stated earlier divorce is rampant. Even within the church. I have already explained in an earlier blog how God can use spouses to help us be better. This is why I appreciate and respect the much-needed ministry of Focus on the Family. Listen to what King Solomon tells us about the family (Proverbs 23:18-28.) Then Solomon ends his insight on family with instructions to parents. He tells them, " train up your children in the way they should go, even when they are old, they will not turn from it (Proverbs 22: 6.)" Parents teach their children how to live. If you are offended by anything I have said. Don't come to me, I am just a hand. Take it up with the head. And that's how we will end our discussion on community and how it helps us to grow.

Promises?

Napoleon Bonaparte once said , "Great ambition is the passion of a great character. Those endowed with it may perform very good or very bad acts. All depends on the principles which direct them." For those of you who know me, you know that is my passion to be a godly man; a man of integrity, who keeps his commitments and honors God. That's why when I say I Do, I do. In his current series, Breaking News, James Merritt explains that all of the wars and trouble in the Middle East shouldn't worry us; but should give us hope, because it is proof that God always keeps His promises." It goes all the way back to Genesis and God's promise to Abram(Genesis 12:1-3.) From Genesis to the book of Malachi, God's chosen people constantly turned from God. And every time God remained faithful to them."

Then we get to the New Testament and Jesus arrives on the scene, fulfilling yet another promise, the BIRTH OF LOVE through Jesus, the community of God's chosen expanded beyond the descendants of Abraham. Jesus is the anti-venom to religious poison. Merritt continues, "still one promise hadn't been fulfilled, Israel wasn't a nation(Genesis 12:2.) Then in May of 1948 God fulfilled that promise in one day. Nearly 4000 years after God promised Abram. This shows us three things; God has a plan, He knows the problem(we are neva good enuff,) He always keeps His promises." Even to an elderly, disobedient Abram and Sarah, now that's crazy, that's AMAZING!

Dr. Merritt explains," our trust in God should always be dependent on His promises and not our circumstances; because, if we depend on how our circumstances are to trust God. One day we believe and trust Him and then doubt the next." I stand guilty as charged of that myself. I recently heard Academy Award winning actor Ben Kingsley explain, "when you are in love, you get the feeling the person never takes their eyes off of you. It's a great feeling!"

Most of us would say that only God can forget. But when you think about it forgetting isn't the issue, if we all could forget the wrongs done to us there would be no need to forgive, would there? There wouldn't even be a need for grace, would there? Maybe that's why God doesn't allow us to forget past wrongs, then we wouldn't be able to become more like Him, would we? True forgiveness eliminates the need to forget (1 Corinthians 13:5.) The apostle Paul learned this after he was betrayed by churches in his early ministry (Philippians 4:11-20.) Paul applied the concept of forgraceness here.

Remember, God does what we can't, HE'S ABLE (Philippians 4:13.) Grace doesn't need to chase me down. When Jesus was born, He came to the frontline of this battle between good and evil. That seems unfair, doesn't it? Anderson continues, "I suppose if God were basing His grace toward me on a scale of fairness, I would have been exterminated a long time ago. I could never stand up to God's scale of fairness. I thank God that none of us are judged according to fairness. Who could stand?"

If you remember, in Jesus' time, judgment was THE CAROL OF THE KINGS. Recently, I saw the news Michael Jackson's family say that they were just seeking justice for Micheal's death. Only the Judge(God) can give justice. When we try to pay people back for wrongs, it's called revenge. The Bible is clear that God avenges us(1 Samuel 24:4, 26:11, Proverbs 20:22, Proverbs 24:29, Matthew 5:24, Romans 12:17-19.) I know, it's hard and it doesn't seem fair, does it? Grace is the only REMEDY for my pain.

Grace isn’t fair. Anderson writes, “God made me aware that grace is not fair. In fact grace is unfair and gives beyond what is just or right. It lavishes goodness beyond a measure of exact accounting." God, YOU ALONE can get the glory for THE LIFE I live. When life gets hard, YOUR LOVE helps me GO HARDER and GO CRAZY loving those who hurt me. While at the summit, producer and co-founder of Rainforest Films Will Packer shared with writers," this is your DREAM. You've got to know it and own it." God, I TRUST YOU and I believe your promise. I will STAND ON IT, I know I got it.

Over the Thanksgiving holiday I watched the movie The Hiding Place with my mentor and his wife. It centers around Corrie ten Boom, a Jewish sympathizer who was sent to a concentration camp, where her Christian faith keeps her from despair and bitterness. Corrie survives, and after the war must learn to love and forgive her former captors. Corrie's pastor, Pastor De Ruiter told her, "stubbornness is a child of pride and pride is one of the seven deadly sins." No wonder Jesus said what He did (John 15:13.) I guess the old saying is true," the people you love and care about the most are the ones who can hurt you the most." FOR ONCE IN MY LIFE, I am going to admit that I am still having trouble understanding God's timing, I guess that's why He is making me wait a little more to hear you say, "HELLO," sweetie.

I know this isn't HOW THE STORY ENDS ( 1 Peter 5:5-10.) Because my new BUSTED HEART is telling me I LOVE YOU and I need you now . I know God won't be one day too late, He can save me from this hurricane. I hope Christmas this year is your best ever, MERRY CHRISTMAS BABY. In closing this blog I hope the church will realize THIS IS CHRISTMAS as you BREAK BREAD and DRINK FROM THIS CUP, this is the way God wants us to grow through community!









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